Thursday, October 14, 2004

Would You Like Fries With That Bra?

I went shopping yesterday. Sometimes I was driven out of stores by over-zealous sales people. I had to take out restraining orders on three of them. The ones at Victoria's Secret were the most invasive. I have come to learn that with bras, you get out of them, what you put into them. No I'm not talking about boobies, I am talking about money. If you buy cheap bras, they fall apart. I get that now. The one I was wearing on my quest to find 2 perfect bras, was being held together with safety pins. I was ready to spend some serious $ in pursuit of the perfect brassiere. So, I innocently walked into VS.

Sales lady #1: Hi! Welcome to our store, what are you looking for today?
(I refrained from saying, "Duh, underwear.")

Me: Well, I'll know it when I see it.
(Ha Ha foiled! )

I walked in to the second section.

Sales lady #2: Hi! Let me tell you about that bra you are looking at. It comes in 13 colors, it both lifts and separates and is made of polysynthetic nylon. What size are you?

Me: Whoa, you are moving way to fast. You have to at least buy me dinner first.
(Ha Ha foiled again. )

So I am looking at the bras and I realize every single decent bra in there is $38.99. I'm supposed to pay $80 for 2 good bras?!?!!?

Sales lady #3: Oh, our Angels collection, how many would you like? Ma'am? Where'd she go? Ladies, cover the exits, one is trying to escape without trying on our fall line. Places everyone!!!!

At this point, I ducked behind a mannequin, dropped to the ground, rolled, did a low crawl under a display table, threw a lotion bottle as a diversion and then stood up and made a break for the exit.
Whew! That was insane. I ended up just buying two wonderbras at Macy's. Mostly I'll be wondering what I'll fill them with. Let's see, what else did I buy... Some accessories for my Halloween costume, a cute dog collar with little skulls and cross bones on it for Gabby, undies, and the most amazing corset. Let me just say, Va va va voom!

Speaking of Va Voom, Chris and I finally had one day off together. Very nice. We are not TTC this month, but I think I ovulated today. I wonder if I am going to give in and try out my new Saliva Ovulation Predictor Test. Must. Be. Strong.

Only 16 days until my 29th birthday. Halloween. Yes, I know that explains a lot. You know, sometimes the things we do in our pasts, come back to bite us. Let me give you a personal example. When Chris and I got married, he was 19 and I was 21. He turned 20 just days later. Well, the entire first year of our marriage, I used to tell him, "Aw, would you like me to pick up some beer for you? Since you aren't old enough to buy it for yourself?" And every time he would say, "When you turn 30 and I'm still in my 20s it's going to be payback time." I really thought nothing of it at the time. But now? Chris will not stop saying, "Now that you're almost 30...." I see my future now. Every 10 years he will do this, and I only got in one good dig. Somehow, I don't think, "Aw, I get the Senior discount and you don't" that I could use in 20 or so years, has the same zing to it. Crap.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

VS bras may be expensive, but OMG are they worth it. Bra's fall apart on me so easy, and with having no tata's left to fill them from all the weight loss, they are the only thing that makes it look like maybe I do have something there. And they are comfy. :) I own three so far. I buy them one at a time when I feel like splurging. lol.