Sunday, December 12, 2004

You Might Be A Cop's Wife If....

Except for Michelle, Brina and I who are married to cops, this may not be all that funny, but what the heck here goes anyway, I hope you enjoy.

You Might Be a Cop's Wife If:

*You talk more in code than English sometimes. "10-4, hon."

*Your husband seems to hang up his brain with his badge/gun at the end of the day.

*DH shouts at the TV "That's not proper police procedure!" Every time you watch NYPD Blue .

*You have ammo in you bedside table instead of, well whatever normal people put in there.

*Your husband bought you a bullet proof vest for your birthday, "just in case"

*You have more paper targets up than wall paper.

*Your bathroom material and the secret stash of mags under the bed are both "Guns and Ammo"

*At work your husband can remember a suspect's name, DOB, drivers license number and AKAs but at home he can't remember to take out the trash on Mondays.

*Your husband asks to see the ID of everyone who comes to the door including the mail man.

*You have ever been at a mall/grocery store/video store/restaurant/children's birthday party and suddenly had to leave because your husband saw someone he arrested.

*DH drives like he is in Nascar when in his own personal vehicle, forgetting he is not in a patrol car.

*When you go out to dinner, your husband, points out which waiter, customer or cook is on meth, vicodin etc.

*Your husband can't figure out why everyone isn't getting out of his way, in traffic, like they do when he is at work.

And finally:

*That is a gun in his pocket, even if he is happy to see you.

(These were all based on fact, let me know if you think of any others. Chris is gonna kill me when he reads this one!)


Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh you are killing me....sooo very true.

My other favorite is: I go to pick up my purse and it weighs a ton. Yup he has put his off duty weapon in my purse while I wasn't looking.


He puts his off duty weapon in MY car when I am going on a road trip without him....says it is a conversation started IF I pulled over. "By the way officer my husband sometimes leaves his off duty weapon in the car, so I just wanted you know there may/may not be a weapon in the car". (guess this only applies to us folks in Texas :-)

You know all his friends by their last name only!

On road trips our version of "I Spy" is "What can you pull that car over for?"

DH's good day at the office is when he has a couple of arrests in one night.

I'll know I'll think of later....but that's all I can come up with for now.


Anonymous said...

I sent you an email yesterday, but it got sent back...will try again!

Anonymous said...

Okay, those were funny even to someone who isn't married to a police officer. Thanks for a laugh I desperately needed.

Jen jenbuster@gmail.com

Brina said...

Ok, I have some more...

* Your idea of a fulfilling Saturday night is getting off work on time with no paper.

* You think it would be great if the next edition of trivial pursuit would be a "Guess that Penal/Vehicle Code," so all your friends would have a sporting chance at getting the answers right.

* When you go out to a bar/restaurant, and the scroungiest guy in the place hollers out "Hey! Chicas! What's up? I love you man!" (Turns out he got taken to detox by DH for drunk in public... guess he didn't learn his lesson)

* You can no longer go to the grocery store and be oblivious to the people around you... you know the creep standing behing you in line is a sex registrant from the poictures you've seen around the station.

* When you go to dinner, you automatically take the seat that faces away from the front door, because you know DH must have an eye on the door at all times.

* Your DH records 'Cops' - to take to briefing for training material on what NOT to do.

*Everyone he's ever gone to training with is now referred to as his "buddy" from whatever PD.

Ok, that made me laugh. There are so many things only we understand...