Saturday, May 14, 2005

I'm Still Here!

Part of the reason, I haven't posted in a long time, is because every time I tried to write down the "funny" story of my U/S, it just comes out as one of those "You had to be there." stories. So, just choke out a courtesy laugh for me, k?
So, I went for my 20 week U/S at a different office and the technicians were in training. So I am laying on the table soooo nervous the kid won't cooperate, and 3 people walk in to the room which is about the size of a closet---and not a walk in one. All three are Indian with very thick accents. So they start the scan and they are completely ignoring me. They keep turning the screen away and I keep reaching out and tilting it so I can watch MY kid. So half way through the scan, they all gather around the screen blocking my view.

Tech #1:Fema!

Tech #2:Ahhhhhh!

Tech #3:Oh, yes! Beee-u-tee-ful fema!

(My heart just stops.)

Me: So it's a girl then? (straining to look at the blocked screen)

They all turn and stare at me as if noticing I was in the room for the first time.

Tech #1: Why would you think that? We haven't gotten to that part yet. We are looking at the legs right now.

Me: Oooohhhh FEMUR. (Long awkward pause with all three of them staring at me, like I am an interloping idiot.) All right then, I'll just be over here if you need me.

So the exam continued on with out me. Finally they finish up and the doctor came in.

Doc: (Thick, thick Irish brogue) Let take a look. Oh ( unintelligible) head (unintelligible) ha ha.[proceeds to bang on my stomach, up and down with the wand, in an effort to get the baby to turn.]

Me: [Laughing] Geez, don't dent the kid's head!

Doc: (Unintelligible) Ha Ha Ha dent (?) water (?) cervix (?) (something about a Cadillac ?)

And he leaves the room. Then when I don't move--

Tech #1: He said, go drink some water, so he can get a better look at your cervix.

So as I wander off to the water cooler, I ponder how on earth these people understand each other. After about 15 minutes, I am escorted back in and a very kind Asian woman who has an accent so thick, I never understood her either, takes over. She needed the baby to move so she could see my cervix, so she grabs me by the hip and shoulder (this is after I stared at her for several uncomfortable moments, not understanding what she was asking me to do), and she rolls me onto my side and starts shaking me really hard. I couldn't stop laughing, it seemed so silly. So, the kid finally got the hint and moved. Now, to add to my woes, I have a low lying placenta and will need another scan at 32 weeks to see if I have placenta previa. Sigh, after battling infertility, I don't know why I thought I had a "right" to an easy pregnancy. Oh well. That is my funny story. You had to be there, huh?


Guess what? I am writing this at work! That is another reason it took me so long to post. They let me come back on days. Since I still get sick at night and I cannot stay awake past 1am, I met with my bosses. I politely told them it was either days or I would be back around mid-December. So here I am on my 4th 12 hour day! Boy am I exhausted! After 3 months off, this is a 48 hour week. Every night I go straight to bed. I am so happy to be here, and the officers I am working with now are SOOOOOO much nicer than the night shift guys I was working. Well that is all for now. I will try to write more.


Anonymous said...

Sooo ecited for you and that story was freaking hysetrical, I musta been there!


B.E.G said...

Funny story!....I know how you feel, we've all had thoes long weeks. Enjoy working days, I haven't seen the sun for about 4 years now :-).

Brina said...

I think those tech's musta been the ones who called the PD today... One was so bad I just didn't answer. And he was from CalTrans! The guy said something I didn't understand and after like the 3rd time I said "What?!?" I just didn't respond. So he said "Hewoh? You deh?" (hello, you there?) Anyway, that was really funny... I loved the story.

Jen P said...

So glad to hear things are going well with your little one and that work is being better (well, how can 12 hour days be any good?).

Thinking of you!!